Tonight the Muses are calling. Every now and then, something happens that we can't sit by and watch. We must act. This is one of those nights for me. After acting I felt like there was more to do. And so, I write. It's nothing eloquent, but I think you'll see why it needed to be shared.
How many times have you heard someone, especially an adult, push off blame on to someone else "I didn't do it. It's his/her fault. I'm innocent!" This has become so common in our society today. It is a common practice among adults and accepted by children as the proper way to behave. It is also damaging to all aspects of life, not the least, to ourselves. Have you ever had a relationship - either romantic or platonic - dissolve due to one of you doing something and not taking responsibility? Were you the one who wouldn't take it? Something to think about...
Our egos get in the way. Plain and simple. We want to always be right about everything. The question we need to examine is "why?" Why do we need to know everything? Why do we need to be perfect? Why do we need to always be right? Think back to when you were growing up. If I were a gambling person, I'd bet you spent plenty of time exposed to adults who were the same way. Of course it is reinforced by the need for perfect grades, spelling bees, award programs in school and so on. There is nothing wrong with aspiring to get good grades, learn a lot and be right. The problem is the emphasis on not being wrong.
What's the difference? Imagine this scenario. When I was in elementary school I had one teacher that really pushed the spelling bee. I did well. I made it to the big one in front of the whole school. I then missed my first word. It could have played out two ways: 1. being told it's ok, I would do better next year. Things that acknowledged I was wrong but were still supportive. 2. being laughed at & having the teacher ask over & over (in front of the other students) what was wrong with me? how could I have missed that word? and so on. Number two was my experience. From then on, I would purposely miss my first word during mandatory tryouts so I never had to compete again. Imagine if the other scenario had taken place instead. Maybe in that case I would have worked harder and done better the next year. Maybe I would have felt so supported that I would have eventually won. We'll never know.
I have spent the last few years working hard to overcome the ego, but sometimes it still rears its ugly head. Luckily, I almost always catch it and keep it quiet. Of course it's nice to be right, but it's ok to be wrong. Think of it this way... each time you are wrong gives you an opportunity to learn how to be right! If you learn from your mistakes they can be good things. We make plenty of mistakes in life. We are only human, mistakes are part of what defines us as beings.
Imagine a world in which we are allowed to make mistakes, we are allowed to be wrong. It's ok! Mistakes and being wrong are considered by our society as simply an opportunity to learn. We mess up at work. The boss takes us aside to be trained better so the mistake doesn't happen again...
Our child fails a test at school. Along with the F paper thats sent home is some adapted work to help them understand how they did poorly and get caught up while allowing them to also improve their grade...
We have a big fight with our significant other, but we have learned ways to resolve an argument so the problem doesn't harm the relationship. We talk and the relationship is built even stronger by taking the opportunity to understand the other person better...
This world doesn't exist now, but it can in the future. The only way it will happen is if we start now. When one of these opportunities arise, change the way you respond. Be the change. Improve the world. It starts with one person. Be that person. Show the change. Let it spread to another & another. Then one day it will be the reality. Imagine what a different world it would be - all starting with making it ok to be wrong...
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